I was so excited about starting my tai chi classes again. Last night as I speed walked the 2km from work to get there, they had just started. And as he shows the first movement it felt like coming home again. But as we moved on to the second and third movements I realized that this isn’t what I remember. This isn’t what I did while I was in Cuba on a sandy beach.

I had asked him while in the middle of this class if the movements were in a different order than what I remembered from his last classes. He just smiled and nodded and said oh yes this is different. I ran this over in my head all night.

I went back and I looked at my 24 form Tai Chi videos on YouTube. These were the movements that I practised and tried to not forget.

So this morning I went, why am I stressing about this? I’m taking tai chi because it is so relaxing and it exercises all my arthritic joints, and my inner organs, and my happy feelings. I like taking the class with others to improve my social and physical health. If this class isn’t doing that why am I going?

Unfortunately I had to cancel my classes. But I see this as growth more than losing something. Prior to being happy, I would’ve not questioned why someone was making me uncomfortable. I would’ve just sucked it up and went with the program.

This was a situation where I am in control. I am deciding what makes me happy and what makes me uncomfortable. It is also a situation where I can decide if I have a choice or I don’t have a choice. I can weigh the seriousness of the situation. This is not life or death. Even though I struggled with this decision, I finally excepted that my feelings were the most important. My happy has to stay happy. And to have that happen I have to eliminate unnecessary stress.

I have to accept disappointment. I have to move on, let it go, and just keep finding my happy.

And just as I am finishing this blog, my Amazon package gets delivered. So excited to snowshoe in the bush. Sigh!!! It all works out in the end.

May I be safe. May I be healthy. May I be happy. May I live with ease.